Do Clown Colleges Offer Degrees?

Hebrews 5:12 "For when for the time ye ought to be teachers, ye have need that one teach you again which be the first principles of the oracles of God; and are become such as have need of milk, and not of strong meat."

1 Timothy 1:7-8, "Desiring to be teachers of the law; understanding neither what they say, nor whereof they affirm. 8 But we know that the law is good, if a man use it lawfully;"

2 Timothy 3:7, "Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth."

Galatians 4:11, 16, "I am afraid of you, lest I have bestowed upon you labour in vain. 16 Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth?"

*Note: When the author renders the word 'Church' as shown here, he is referring to the Business Entity, Religious Establishment Institutional 'Church.' When he renders the word church in all lower case letters, he is referring to Christ's Authentic, Legitimate home assemblies He created and continues to build. 

A big part of making a decision for choosing a new pastor has to do with his qualifications and education. These are what is known as, 'credentials.' It is always impressive when a pastor is referred to as "Doctor." A lot of these men feign humility and insist that they be called, 'Brother,' 'Pastor,' 'Preacher' or 'Reverend.' I think they believe this will make them appear more approachable and endearing to their flock. Okay, fine. I won't pretend to know their motives. I do feel however, that going after a doctorate from Bible College is more of a career move than anything else. Let's face it; most who strive to get a higher degree usually does so to get a better paying job. In a pastor's case, the higher the educational credentials, the higher Profile 'Church' he will attract. The author of the book of Hebrews seems irritated at some teachers. He tells them that they need to be taught again. As a matter of fact, he tells them that they need to go back to spiritual kindergarten. These are men who either have vast educations or the illusions of having a vast education. They seem to have applied what they have learned through the traditions of the elders and imposed these upon the New Covenant Christians and Christ's church. The author is putting them in their proper place; in the back of the line.

2 Timothy 3: 8-9, "Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith. 9 But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as theirs also was." Here in 2 Timothy, Paul warns Timothy that there will be men who will resist the truth concerning the faith. The men he is writing about are reprobates. These men, by definition, can be lost or saved. For a reprobate is defined as, 'expresses or feels disapproval of.' If lost, they reject the teachings of Christ. If saved, they turned their backs on the sound teachings of Christ. I would lean towards the former, but for illustration purpose, I'd like to present these men as saved turncoats. These are men who are ever learning, but never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. I don't mean the truth about salvation. I'm talking about the truths within the Truth regarding sound Biblical doctrine.

I once heard a pastor, who owned a doctorate in Theology (ThD) say, "I can't understand how people can say that tithing isn't taught in the New Testament, when Hebrew 7 makes it clear that it is." This was a man who was in his thirty-third year of being the pastor of the same 'Church' he started. He was well respected and almost deified among his members during his reign and even after his retirement. Later, after I left this 'Church,' I reflected back on what he said. I thought to myself, 'Does Hebrews 7 really teach the doctrine of N.T. tithing?" (For a closer look at this subject, I refer the reader to my post, 'Does Hebrews 7 Teach Us To Tithe?'). This question was the catalyst that brought me to investigate just how accurate he was. In the past I had asked him if the term 'Under Shepherd' was in the Bible, and he assured me that it was. He directed me to a trustee to find it, as he didn't have the Biblical address handy off the top of his head. The trustee sought out the verse for a long time until he gave up. It wasn't there. The pastor had mistaken the term with another called, 'Under Girding,' which had nothing to do with a pastor or a shepherd. I thought to myself, "How can he be so off base on something so on point as 'Under Shepherd' not being in the Bible, and N.T. tithing being a false doctrine?"

This man has loads of education under his belt and a sheepskin to boot! He's been there in a position of authority for over three decades and has overseen eight building Projects for his Institutional 'Church' facilities that has cost his flock millions of dollars. Who was I to doubt him? I only had the same advantage he has. We both have God's Word on our side. In light of God's Word, and witnessing many inconsistencies within this Institute, I began to look at this man in a new way. I knew that he had graduated from a Prominent Bible College and was a disciple of a very high Profile and revered legendary preacher and author. But, if he is that wrong about Under Shepherds and Tithing, how much wrong is he on other vital doctrines? My esteem of him started to dwindle as I looked upon this polished, serious and distinguished man as somewhat clownish. I do not mean that he is stupid or even goofy. I mean, I've had my moments as well. I just think it's funny that pastors who seek this high education, fraught with such erroneous concepts of the basic teachings of Scripture, have elevated themselves as being 'the ones in the know.' It's just so comical!

I thought, "If these men can get a degree among their peers, I bet that a clown can do the same thing." Then it hit me like a punch in the face! The higher institutions of learning these men are trained by, were nothing more than extensions of the lower Institutes of the man-made, Main-Stream, Religious, Corporate, Business Entity System, 'Church,' Think about it; Bob Jones University, Baylor University, Hyles~Andersen College, Calvin College, Midwestern, Moody Bible Institute, Shawnee Baptist College, Dallas Theological Seminary, Tennessee Temple University, Clown College, er, I mean Crown College, Liberty University, Harvard, Southern Methodist University, Aquinas College, Loyola, St. Johns University, Stetson University, Notre Dame and hundreds, maybe thousands of others were all started from an Institutional 'Church.' All of these schools were born from the best of intentions, but they have become a blight on the landscape of Biblical education.

Well, it turns out I was right! Believe it or not, there is a Bachelor's of Clown Science Degree (BCS) for Clowns available. I searched the web for any school that offers a doctorate, but no luck. Perhaps when the acceptance of clowning academia reaches new heights as the clergy have ascended to, then maybe, just maybe, they will attain the respect and admiration those men behind the pulpits of America have. In my view, the difference between the two degrees would be narrow at best. Why? Because a lot of these pastors who possess Bachelors, Masters and even Doctorate degrees handle God's Word and His teachings just about as skillfully as a clown who's pants fall to his ankles when he pulls a handkerchief from his jacket pocket. In other words, if these Bozos in Bible College can get a degree, then why can't those other Bozos get one? Sorry for the imagery. I am not saying these things as a disparagement to those who have degrees of any kind. A lot of the time, they are necessary to be a good Professional in any line of work. I am pointing my finger at those who misappropriate Scripture for their own gain and then claim authority to do so by hiding behind a degree. Pastors should not be a Professional Clergyman. As I've said many times before, the pastorate is not a Profession; it's a ministry! If they want to teach God's Word in truth, they need to be taught again. Let themselves be taught by the only Teacher qualified enough to guide them and not by the Dean of Clowns (Satan). The tuition is free. There is only one text book to study and the Teacher's name is the Holy Spirit of Jesus Christ.

I know that God gave us good teachers. But, I also know that Satan has given us teachers with itching eras. I understand that everyone can be wrong about something. That's not the Problem I see. The Problem I see is that when the error is uncovered, a great majority of these 'learned men' refuse to accept the truth. They go right on teaching their damnable heresies anyway because they'd rather boil in oil than to admit to their disciples that they were actually wrong! Because of this attitude, I echo what Paul wrote; "I am afraid of you!" I hope none of my friends who toiled in Bible College receive this piece as a bitter pill to swallow. I am sure most of them would admit that many years after they attained their degrees associated with theology, they realized that they had to spend many more years unlearning what they learned. God looks on the heart, not a degree. I look at the character of a man, not a degree.

I am not trying to anger anyone, believe me. That is not my intent. I'm just trying to point out the truth and sometimes the truth hurts and is sometimes ugly. I am not your enemy because I tell you the truth ~ Gal 4:16. People who read this might say, "How could you say such things about our beloved school? I paid good money to send my kids there!" Or some might say, "I take great pride that I graduated Magda Come Lordy at Great Gulf Between Me and Thee University!" Dear Reader, I know that subtlety is not one of my strong suits, and this article may not sit well with a great number of you, but let me point out the main thrust of this piece by calling your attention to just two things. First, there is a trickle down effect to consider. These schools got their initial directives from the 'Church' from which they sprung. In other words, if that 'Church' preached works salvation from her pulpits, they will hand down that theology as a mandate to the Professors who teach the student. When the student graduates and takes this theology into the field, they will spread this heresy to those they convert. As the converts grown in this doctrine, they will pass it along to their offspring who will, more than likely, believe it for life and pass it down to his own family.

Second, if those 'Churches' preached and taught heresies like N.T. tithing, then all of them are guilty of mishandling God's Word by association. I don't know of one Bible College that doesn't teach N.T. Tithing. And I'm not even talking about some other pagan doctrines taught by some as an attempt to further their agenda. I am concerned that well meaning individuals are taught what an Institutional 'Church' wants them to learn, and now they are unwittingly passing down those heresies to others. May the LORD allow us all to see that a degree isn't a license to spread false doctrine. To do so would be fool hardy, and that would be clownish. If members of the clergy want to handle God's Word like a clown, I suggest they go to Clown College and get a BCS.

So, do Clown Colleges offer degrees? Apparently they do! But so do Bible Colleges! What's the difference? In my humble opinion, Clown Colleges appear more reputable than their Bible College counterparts. Why? Because they do not try to teach their paying students to twist something as pure as the Word of God into something it's not. The only thing a Clown College teaches to twist are balloons into balloon animals. The Bible Professors, teachers, pastors and the clergy Produced by these modern day so-called "Bible Colleges" need to be taught again. What evidence do I submit to support such a statement? I refer the reader to the articles in this blog in light of the Bible. These students desire to be teachers, honest teachers and even Professors, but do not understand what they say or affirm. They're ever learning but never come to the knowledge of the truth. Yes, like Paul, I am afraid of them; and any discerning, truth seeking Believer should be too.